Emotional rattle

I dont know the reason and there is simply no explaination for such feeling. Deep inside, there is just no reason for a smile. Perhaps it's common for ladies to experience such emotional stages but somehow i just feel something's not too right this time.

Could it be due to work, family, relationships, $$ etc... i really dont know! Maybe it's just because im growing horizontally more each day, which is causing me to be depressed! Life sucks!

At work, I certainly dont feel as close to the team as before, since my HK trip and somehow i have this feeling that people start to question my role in the department. Anyway, no point explaining - im convinced anyhow that I should be the most dispensible in the team. I have thoughts to leave this depressing and demoralising place but something's pulling me back - laziness i think...

For $$ - i guess the best song to describe my feelings is "Money Money Money by ABBA"

I work all night,
I work all day, to pay the bills I have to pay
Ain't it sad
And still there never seems to be a single penny left for me
That's too bad

In love - after a long courtship, i dont know if people still call it LOVE or is it just a habit being together. The best love song that describes how a man should love a woman is none other than "Have you ever really loved a woman - Bryan Adams"

To really love a woman
To understand her - you gotta know it deep inside
Hear every thought - see every dream
N' give her wings - when she wants to fly
Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms
You know you really love a woman

When you love a woman
you tell herthat she's really wanted
When you love a woman
you tell her that she's the one
she needs somebody to tell herthat it's gonna last forever
So tell me have you ever really - really really ever loved a woman?

To really love a woman
Let her hold you - til ya know how she needs to be touched
You've gotta breathe her - really taste her
Til you can feel her in your blood
N' when you can see your unborn children in her eyes
You know you really love a woman

When you love a woman
you tell her that she's really wanted
When you love a woman
you tell her that she's the one
she needs somebody to tell her
that you'll always be together
So tell me have you ever really - really really ever loved a woman?

You got to give her some faith - hold her tight
A little tenderness - gotta treat her right
She will be there for you, takin' good care of you
Ya really gotta love your woman...

Then when you find yourself lyin' helpless in her arms
You know you really love a woman

When you love a woman
you tell herthat she's really wanted
When you love a woman
you tell her that she's the one
she needs somebody to tell her
that it's gonna last forever
So tell me have you ever really - really really ever loved a woman?

Just tell me have you ever really, really, really, ever loved a woman?
You got to tell me
Just tell me have you ever really,really, really, ever loved a woman?

Im tired... mentally, physically, emotionally... Good night and i hope tomorrow will be a better day.

Updates

This must have been the longest 'delay' in uploading my entries...

Reasons?

• i have been busy
• I am lazy to pen my thoughts and happenings
• Too many things happening to record all of them

Nonethless, since im awake now and Tat is but playing his games in the living room, i shall use his laptop to rattle some thoughts...

It was a HAPPENING December and Q1 of 2009. Now that the official launch is over, i think i can breathe better at work (although there are still NONSENSE surfacing). Anyway, work aside, life is still going quite well.

Went to Hong Kong to visit Disneyland on my birthday and finally took pictures with Mickey Mouse! Thanks to Tat for this wonderful experience and we actually spent every single cent there, coming home with no HK Dollars left + 2 credit card bills...haha. The bulk of the money was spent on gifts, souvenirs and also LAU PO BING...Yummy Yummy...Carried a whole big bag back but still not enough to dstribute.

The only worse thing was to see Mr. B at Disneyland!! Of all people, why him? Anyway, i didnt or rather couldnt call him (as we were in the q). Hope he didnt see us as well...Unlucky!

Went on shopaholic mood recently as well...bought tops, dresses and the more dresses (maxi) from all over. The best was to get a dress and top from Joop. Didnt even spend a single cent - use mainly vouchers...haha.

I simply enjoy shopping but i need to recover (from the trip) before i spend the spree again. Things will go slower now. Hence i have indulge myself in online spree now - cheaper!!

Let's see when my next entry will come...Take care folks.