Do you believe in Karma?

After encountering and experiencing so many things lately, I cannot help but to believe that Karma does exists and it comes in many forms that sometimes you dont even realise it.

Lots of self-reflections going on lately and I cannot help but only to attribute them to Karma falling upon me.

Now here's the list:

When I was much younger (havent start to date), I used to tell myself that I will find myself a Tall and Handsome Man to marry. Average looking men are not my cup of tea.

MY "KARMA": In 2011, I married a man slightly shorter and more than average looking as my husband. The good thing is he seems to be looking better as he grows. Likely he is another Miao Qiao Wei category where they become more charismatic as they aged.

I used to tell or rather scold my friends when they start to cry over break-ups or become emotionally dependent on their boyfriends. Women must not trust their men 100% and must be independent.

MY "KARMA": After being attached and marriage, I realised I am just like those girlfriends whom I have ever told off or scolded. I am emotionally, mentally and physically dependent on my man such that people start to say my world only revolves around him.

I have a Best Buddy Ms P and being an introvert, I hate to make calls to enquire on things. As such, maintaining this 18 years of friendship, I pretty much earned myself a secretary too as she will always help me make calls for appointments and/or contact my mum for outings.

MY "KARMA": As my roles in life start to expand (not just being a daughter, student, girlfriend etc), there are many things which I can no longer depend on Ms P. My seniors in life start to ask that I call up the to check on this and check on that. Sometimes I wonder why I am the one being arrowed to do so when they should be the ones more concerned over the matter.

As I reflect, I recognize that the boomerang has U-turned to hit me back, right smack in the face. The list just goes on and it has come to a point where I fear telling people my thoughts and comments. What if I say the 'wrong thing' and I get hit again. I think my life in 2013 hasnt been smooth-sailing and I dont think I can take anymore hits as my mind, body and soul are already at their most fragile stage. If God exits, please take this pain and unhappiness away from me.

After reading this, do you believe in Karma?

Paying for Companion

I recall Mr T used to share with me and his group of friends how he wished he could retire as a "Duck" and spend his time dancing (ballroom dancing) and accompanying rich Tai-Tais.

His job would purely be using his gift-of-gab to humour those women and to dance with them at Club 5 with strict policy of no extra services. Whenever he mentions this, I will usually counter-propose that I can also consider quitting my job and take on a same role. With no extra service rendered, I will only accompany men who need a listening ear or a dance partner on the dance floor.

He of course disagreed as he could visualise what those men had up their sleeves. Having discussed this topic several times, I never thought I would be paying for such services for myself. Yes, I did, recently.

I did it out of desperation, confusion and loneliness. I had to share what was running in my mind with someone. Someone who is neutral and hopefully able to help me sort my thoughts. I was pretty nervous when I first arrived that I just broke down at the first 5 minutes. He was quick and kind enough to offer me some tissue paper as I started to speak.

We spent 1.5hrs in the room talking to each other and we spoke about the past, the present and the future. It was rather comforting as he listened to whatever I wanted to say and remained neutral throughout the conversation. He asked some questions but I guess at that point in time, my mind was 50% blank (yes, I was nervous throughout as I do not know what to expect from this young stranger. I dont even know if he is actually younger than I am.) and couldnt answer them at all.

I made payments after 1.5hrs and as I walked out alone, I realised I had actually missed out many other things that I wanted to share, many confusions that were still running in my head. For this reason, I knew I needed a second session with him again.

When? I have not decided and I don't know...

Overall, the experience to engage someone for campanionship is not too bad and I can now understand why so many people are doing so.

March 2013

2 March, we finally moved into our new nest at punggol.

I must say the feeling is really different and the things that I need to do is also very different. From managing a room to managing the whole house, I think all women (who takes care of their family) deserves a pat on the back.

This is only the third day we moved in and I must say the perspiration I had is more than a jog at the stadium.

Everyday I am more concern to make sure every corner of the house is kept clean and tidy (though we have not finish unpacking the boxes). I also make sure there is enough food to cook for him. After years of not stepping into the kitchen, I must say my culinary needs more improvement (for now, just bear with it lah).

While getting busy with household, he has also been sick since 28 Feb. Fever on a roller coaster till today. Everyday he spends his day eating and sleeping and I feel like I'm staying here all by myself. So looking forward for him to recover so that there's someone to talk to me.

Work is just as bad. Oh decided not to talk about it.

Looking forward to better days and months in 2013!! Gambetei!!

The Bangkok Post (7 to 10 Sept 12)

Supposedly a friends trip to BKK, but those whom we asked could not make it or didn't want to go.

So it was the four of us again (Hubby, Peggy, my mum and I) setting off...

7 Sept:
Arrived at BKK at Thailand time 10pm. For safety reasons, we decided that we should just head back to the hotel straight. We had the Thai McD and they serve my favourite fried chicken and also a new favored pie - tuna pie. I hope Singapore brings it in too coz it is nice.

Our hotel is called Glow Pratunam and it is only a months old. Boutique hotel above a shopping mall and its colour theme is striking pink with black. The rooms are big and clean. I like!!

8 Sept:
Our agenda for the day was to visit Terminal 21, Platinum mall and MBK. But because we met many helpful people along the way and hence there were many distractions. We ended up doing some praying along the way and also went to a Thai trade fair. They sold expensive Jewellery and silk so it was not suitable for us. In the end we only managed to go to Terminal 21 and MBK.

Terminal 21 was good, for photo taking. Haha. The concept (different levels represent different countries) of the mall is good and I especially like the uniforms of the concierges and security guards. Some of the shops there sell quite pretty clothes but me being a 'cheapo nana', I thought they were quite expensive.

We also visited MK restaurant and had the recommended steamboat. It was good and I like it!! Very cheap too. 4 pax was only SGD $44!!!

9 Sept:
Finally it was time for Platinum Mall. We decided to forgo Chatukchak because of safety and also because we really couldn't finish exploring the shopping heaven. Platinum Fashion Mall had so much to see and most of the things were so cheap (compared to Singapore). If given more time and if not for my bored husband, I think we would have bought more, literally shop till u drop (don't even need to eat). Nonetheless it was still a good trip as I bought many many clothes. Now I need to think where to keep them. As of now, my wardrobe is already full!!!

10Sept:
Last day!! So sad and I couldnt sleep the previous night. I kept thinking about work and worried I didnt handover things properly. We spent our last day shopping at the shops below our hotel. Got some accessories and we decided to head opposite to Platinum again for some last minute shopping. Bought a few more pieces of clothes and accessories and we went to eat before heading to the airport.

We reached Singapore at about 920pm and this was the first time travelling with Tiger Airways, budget terminal. Some of the food selection were the same as Jetstar and I think Air Asia's food was better and cheaper.

Till my next travelling encounter(dunno when also), thanks for reading!!

Home sweet Home...

Starting September

1 September:
Instead of the usual fun stuff, we went to donate blood - for a good cause!!
My face turned pale when I was called in for health screening. Apparently a patient had some reactions after receiving my blood together with others. So they are now checking whose blood is the contributing factor of the anti-bodies of which the patient was allergic to. While the doctor assured me that it was normal and that there is no cause for alarm, I still don't feel good. I still think I am going to die soon, like I always tell my husband and friends (quite sad because I still have many things not accomplished).

2 September:
We had an inaugural picnic at Marina Barrage. Quite a unique experience as compared to usual outings just that the sun was too hot. We were under the shade but I still became a lobster after that few hours of outdoor sunshine.

All in all, it was quite a good start and I hope things continue to go well and I can remain loved and happy. May I be blessed...

The Love Hate Week

Though this is a short week, it has been freaking busy and I seriously can't wait for the weekend to come, not to say my trip in Sept.

The consolation to this bad week is of course my time with 老公. He has been quite nice and sweet this week and hope this goes on.

Today is finally Friday and I hope it gets through smoothly.

1 night 2 clubs

It has been a long long time since I drank alcohol and had visited a club. Last night, we visited 2 clubs in 1 night and I felt young again.

We first went to New Asia Bar for a girls' night out and subsequently to Arena to join the guys. It was much better at the Arena with dancing, jumping and drinking. We ended the night of fun, drunk and young at about 4am.

Though our bodies are physically tired, I had fun and I felt young. Hmmm, maybe we should meet up more often like this.

Back to the reality, this morning, my hubby said I look like a thirty plus rather than my actual age. @$$;}^%#* So much so of feeling young just the night before....